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Out of the Den

The Lions are back! Restore the roar! Silver Rush! .....ah...I'll believe it when I see it. I love the Lions to death, but they have made a career out of breaking the fans hearts...since I will write about the Lions for my fellow fans. I will get uber-excited and uber-depressed doing this...because that is the lot that Lions fans have been dealt.

Lions lose preseason opener; fans shrug

Welcome back to another NFL season.  Last year, the Lions shocked a lot of people by actually fielding a competitive team.  Who knew it could be done?  Some thought it might be illegal and contacted the league to make sure that the Lions wouldn't be docked draft picks for such a blatant contradiction to tradition.

The Lions boasted a 10-6 record and actually made the playoffs for the first time in over ten years.  Again, national pundits said things like, "What?  I didn't think they still played football there."

And after all that, this off season some national writers said things like "Super Bowl Contenders" and "legitimate."  It was like we Lions fans were living on Mars.  It just didn't seem real.

So the Lions showed us...and promptly built up seven different arrests for DUI, drug possession and other offenses, causing these same pundits to call the Lions "uncontrolled" and "undisciplined:" and that now they were just "pretenders."

So now, the season has started and the first preseason game has been played and the Lions lost.

Why?  Because they were "undisciplined"?  "Uncontrolled"?

Nope, it was because they were actually worrying more about evaluating players than they were about the final score.  In fact, they were playing liked they were actually priming themselves up for the weird is that?

Stafford didn't look all that sharp.  He threw a pick and had a long pass to Calvin Johnson that was completed, but Johnson had to slow down to make the catch, allowing the defensive back to catch up and make the tackle on what should have been an easy score and not just a thirty yard gain.

The defense managed to put some nice pressure on the Browns' QB's, but Suh threw in a late hit that would have gotten him fifteen yards in the regular season with real referees.

Rookie corner back Bill Bently started and after a shaky first series looked really good.

And then, in the fourth quarter, the nobodies, who will be packing groceries and selling insurance next month,  gave up a late field goal and the lead.

Did it mean anything?  Nope.  It meant just as much as the 4-0 preseason that the Lions had before going 0-16.

Holding? The NFL should drop it.

Zumapress/Icon SMI - Giants Center got to hold Lombardi after getting called for the only holding call...

Hey NFL, why don't you just admit that nobody knows how or when or maybe even why to call a holding penalty?  It's a farce.  The only logical thing to do is either drop it as a penalty or admit that the NFL and the referees have a free hand in determining who they want to win any game played.

Seriously, the refs cannot EVER call it consistently.

In the playoffs this year the the lack of holding calls has been prominent, especially in a league that has mostly forsaken the run game for the passing game.  If teams are passing upwards of 50 times a game, where are all the holding calls?  How are we watching legitimately fair games played by the rules if the refs are cherry-picking when they call "Holding?"  It begs the question, "Are these games on the level?"

Over the last 20-30 years the league has consistently done everything in it's power to increase scoring and the excitement of the passing why don't they just go that extra step, quit the charade and just strike "Holding" from the rule books?  They're not calling it anyway, and they're certainly not calling it why allow there to be any lingering doubt over the legitimacy of the game?

Striking holding will allow for much more fervent and effective protection of the million dollar QB assets that the league has also blitzkrieg'ed rule after rule to protect.  Furthermore, it'll allow for more time in the pocket, allowing for more completed passes, and more scoring...the Holy Grail for TV ratings and a large percentage of fans.

The way it is called now is not fair, if you're not going to be fair, be not fair to everybody...that's somehow...kind of...fair? 

Frankly, throwing out holding will penalize teams that have been built on defense, which will further the road down offense only football...which is really what the league seems to want.  Maybe someday soon the league will get rid of defense all together and...then get rid of the offensive lineman, because obviously you won't need them anymore...just quarterbacks and receivers...but they can get rid of receivers too if they just put targets out on the field...then it'll just be quarterbacks...and the scoring will go crazy're right, that's stupid...but then so is only calling a very debilitating penalty when the refs feel like it.

Things to watch at the Super Bowl...if you're a Lions fan.

Tom Croke/Icon SMI - At least therell cheerleaders...

I hate Tom Brady.  He's incredibly handsome, hangs out with all the Hollywood elite, married a supermodel, had a kid with another, wasn't drafted until the sixth round, has won three Super Bowls. The only thing that would make his story any more Cinderella-esque would be if he gave it all up after winning tonight and went to bag groceries and changed his name to "Kurt Warner."

I'm not especially fond of Peyton's little brother either.

And Bill Belichik is as appealing and likeable as Emperor Palpatine eating babies.  He's so loveable that he cut a poor guy the morning of the Super Bowl after the poor dupe had the Patriots logo shaved into the back of his head....

So what else is there to watch this biggest football Sunday of the year?  Other than an unhealthy, sick and demented desire to see Brady broken into six pieces and buried under the halftime platform where Madonna can dance on his bloody bones...

Well, there's Wes Welker...the mighty mite that just keeps catching passes, racking up yards and scoring touchdowns...another one of those "great stories" that litter the Boston boys PR machine.

The Giants have this Welker-clone guy named Victor Cruz...another no name from nowhere who almost singlehandedly lifted the G-Men to these high and lofty heights.

But if you're not interested in having to hear about any more of these sappy, bad script stories...just concentrate on the Giants D-Line and try hard to imagine that they're wearing the Honolulu Blue and Silver.  Imagine that the Lions are being built upon the D-Line and defense.

And much more importantly, watch the them as they cheer behind the plays as they cut to them in between million dollar commercials and stupidly stick ads on top of their pretty faces and gorgeous...uniforms...

And hope that someday soon the Ford's will change their stubborn minds about putting a dance team on the sidelines at Ford Field.  Hope...imagine...dream...