As a Lions fan, I have fostered and cultivated a sublime loathing of Brett Favre...the Devil who wears #4....but the devil is gone now...retired (I've heard that before...)

And as of yet, he has not returned. 

And as anyone who is an avid fan of horror and just generally scary movies, the vanquishing of an evil that great leaves a nasty void....and something will come forward to fill it.

Logically, one would assume that that would probably be Aaron Rodgers...and whereas I don't think he's necessarily a good guy in most Lions' eyes...he's no devil-esque Farve-type...more like a Snidely Whiplash--and who can take anybody with handlebar mustaches seriously anymore?

Maybe someday, Rodgers will be able to ascend to such dastardly heights...but not yet. 

So then, who fills the void...Tom frickin' Brady fills the void.  That's who.

This guy is so worthy of hate.  He has everything!  He's married to a super model.  He's got a kid with another super model.  He's in movies.  He's won three super bowls.  Everything he touches turns to gold.  He's really good looking too...not that I've noticed...He's all smiley and funny and enormously rich...

I'm pretty sure that Tom Brady is either the devil himself...or he's made a pretty one sided deal with him.

And the new devil is on his way to Detroit for the third preseason game...the one all of the starters are supposed to play the whole first half of...

What can the Lions expect from the devil?  What should you watch for?  Let me tell you.

1. Again, does Matthew Stafford stay healthy?  Really, that's all that matters in this game.  He is the whole kit and kaboodle.  One day, hopefully, Stafford will be some other teams' devil---like hopefully, Green Bay's or Chicago's. 

2.   Does the D-line play well?  Hopefully well enough that the Kong will break through the line, rip off Brady's right arm and bury it under a goal post.  That'd be sweet...of course, the NFL would have to fine him again....

3.  Does Louis Delmas even show up....I know they'll announce his name as a starting safety...but does he really play.  More than two tackles worth?

4. Who's running the ball for the Leo's?  Are they worth a damn?

5. Can Willie Young continue to mangle and devestate the grocery baggers that'll he be playing against in the fourth quarter?

6.  How does Jeff Backus look good in his first action this season?  How does the line look in general?  If the Lions can run the ball and Stafford isn't on a stretcher...they're probably doing pretty good.

7. Rookie WR Titus Young is getting his first action.  I think the kid ways 12 pounds, but I may be overstating it.  Let me just say that he's....skinny.  Hopefully, he's fast enough to avoid getting smashed into a thousand piece jig-saw puzzle.

Oh, and I don't say all that stuff about Brady because I'm jealous of Mr. Perfect...really....I'm not....I swear....

So as I read through the gamebook I downloaded of last Friday night's game against the Browns a few things kind of popped out at me....by not showing up in the stats.

As I rewatched the game, something else became exceedingly clear by it's extreme lack of....being there at all.

Where was Louis Delmas?  Now, I know that Amari Spievey is lighting it up this preseason.  He seems to be everywhere...but he is not alone in deep middle of the field.

Delmas is supposed to be back there too.  And he recorded 0 tackles, 0 passes broken up, 0...anything....but he was in the starting lineup....I checked that to make sure he wasn't a late scratch or something...Nope, he was there and on the field even.

So I dug up last week's gamebook and you know what Delmas' line was? 2 tackles and 1 assisted tackle....not much...in fact I think I remember a game where a hot dog vender at the Silverdome recorded an "assist" by being unusually loud during a play where a running back tripped over his own shoe laces.  Anybody can register an assist.

Louis Delmas is supposed to be the Lions "secret" weapon.  He has played lights out for two years...granted, he hasn't picked off a whole lot of passes, but he's usually everywhere, making hits, causing fumbles, recovering fumbles, leading a secondary...even when there really wasn't anybody to lead...

And this year....I hope he comes back soon...because if Spievey can keep it up and Delmas can come back to form, people won't just be talking about the front four anymore.

Forgive me if I can't even be the least bit excited that the Lions fourth stringers were able to come back and beat the Browns' fourth stringers for a 30-28 victory.  Ninety five percent of all the participants that made the outcome of this game possible will not be on an NFL roster in two more weeks.

And the whole 2-0 thing?  Come back in a month and let me know what their record is, because four years ago I watched the Leo's rack up a most impressive 4-0 preseason record...only to follow that up with the NFL's first 0-16 season.

So...I will not be attending any parades over the Lions ability to keep the Edmund Fitzgerald Memorial trophy with their second straight victory in the Great Lakes Classic.

Here's what I took away from the game.

1. Matthew Stafford has learned to throw the ball into the stands when being flushed out of the pocket...he did it a lot, with style even on Friday night.  This typically saved him a sack and a yard or two of field position...but did kind of deflate his completion percentage.

2.  Nate Burleson may have a future as a balarina.  That's two weeks in a row he's caught touchdowns while barely tapping his toes in bounds.  Most impressive.

3.  S. Amari Spievey still looks awesome.  He's everywhere, making tackles all over the field and it got me to wondering...where the heck has his partner in crime been for the last two weeks?  I can't recall ever hearing an announcer mention that S Louis Delmas has done anything yet.  He's supposed to be the potential all pro safety...

4.Somebody needs to see if "Mad" Willie Young can play against the real players, you know the ones that'll still be playing in a month...because he is eating up this camp fodder he's been playing against.

5.  The vaunted Lions defensive front four looked pretty...well "not vaunted."  The Browns, who I frankly don't think are an all world team, were able to put up 21 points in the first half on them.  This all led by Colt McCoy, who a lot of people were figuring wouldn't be around for the Browns again this year...due to a less than stellar freshman year in the NFL.

Maybe the Browns do have a QB of the future in McCoy, or maybe the Lions are back to their age old tradition of making every quarterback they face Hall of Fame worthy.

The year the Ford's gave Matt Millen an extension instead of the boot after another dismal, disgusting showing, I decided I was giving up on the Lions. 

No longer would they hold this nasty mystical possession of my soul.

Nope, I was going to throw my fanaticism and karmic flow behind another organization...preferably one with Cheerleaders.

So after a painstaking pairing down process I was left with two likely contenders for my fandom....The Tennessee Titans and the Cleveland Browns.

And I chose the Browns...why?  I abandoned the cheerleader rule for the Browns....because I really liked what they were doing at the time.  I loved Joe Thomas and thought Brady Quin would be decent.  I liked Braylon Edwards and Kellen Winslow Jr...and they were the Lions...with just more boring colors...

And it lasted all of maybe one game...those teams were awful...just like the Lions...and I crawled back to the pathetic I knew instead of the disgusting I couldn't stomach.

And so tonight the Lions play the Browns in the yearly Great Lakes Classic...winner gets the Edmund Fitzgerald Trophy (I'm not making this up.)

Five things to watch...

1.  Most important for every game ever for the Lions...keep Stafford standing.  Keep the Franchise alive and there's a chance for greatness.

2. Who's playing cornerback?  Both Eric Wright and Chris Houston are game time decisions.  Alphonso Smith is still out...who's going to be out there?  Pylons?

3. Do any of the running backs not named "Best" look like they can play...or more importantly pick up a tough yard.

4. Is Amari Spievey still looking like a world beater at safety?  Dude looked really good in week one.

5. Are the Lions stopping the run?  Peyton Hillis is the Browns only really effective weapon.  If Hillis is stopped, it'll most likely mean that the Lions linebackers are all getting on the same page.

Enjoy the game and write the Lions to try and get cheerleaders.